throughout my  entire stay in singapore this time round(july hols).. yesterday was one of the worst ever.. my mom and dad have been lying to me.. and still they didnt want to admit it.. especially my mom.. she keeps saying that i dont tell her stuff.. but how in the world am i meant to do that.. she wants me to treat her like a friend.. but its impossible.. my parents dont care abt me.. thats what i feel.. i feel like im a disgrace to them.. and that they just wanna scold me abt every single thing that i do.. so yeah.. i doubt i can get any love from them.. we had this mega arguement this morning at like 2am.. i came home late and yeah.. we quarrelled for like an hour plus.. nothing good came out of it.. urghh.. still so annoying.. whats wrong if i come home late.. its like im almost 18 for goodness sakes.. but whatever.. i got hell for coming home late.. and i got yelled at really bad..then after that everything else just seemed to slot in.. my mom called me a bloody shit.. yeahh and alot of other hurtful things and threats were used.. all the other things that have been buried for awhile just came up.. so the arguement got real big..now i cant stand living in this family.. its hell...

i went to get a hair dryer at best denki in plaza sing.. then after that i rushed off to meet jasmine zhang from foundation class in curtin at orchard mrt.. we had the best catching up so far.. she told me all the stuff that had happened to her so far.. and i told her abit of whats been happening to me.. yeah and we talked from 3 till around 530 and then took neoprints.. it was really good to have the old times back.. we didnt have a very fantastic past.. cos there was a period of time where we had this misunderstanding.. but now everything is pretty good.. so im glad for that..  we went to delifrance first and after that long john's silver.. i felt somehow like though we're not really that close physically.. emotionally she somehow trusts me.. i have no idea why.. she shares all her secrets with me.. and i feel really flattered for that.. shes a nice girl.. im so happy that we dun hate each other like we used to.. somehow we have both grown up after going thru what we went thru.. especially going to perth to live a life... its pretty tough.. since we all gotta be so independent..

after that i went to meet beck.. stoopid me was really late.. i made her wait.. felt quite bad.. but after that we went window shopping and we both got this really cool badge that says.. im a princess thats why.. hahah and we pinned it on..met up with her friends jeremy and hao chan who works at guardian to sell some slimming products or something... yeah and they are really cool to hang out with.. jeremy really reminds me of one of my really crappy friends.. he is hell funny.. so we all talked and it was pretty cool.. heheh i felt pretty comfortable around them.. then after that they walked me to the bus stop and i had to go and meet reiner..

haha  i was meant to meet reiner at 9 but i ended up meetin him at lik 10 plus after.. he wanted me to go to this club in holland v but i didnt wanna so we went to haagen daaz instead.. saw a bunch of his friends and yeah.. they pretty much got the wrong idea abt us.. but heck.. as long as our consciences are clear... they were pretty funny as well.. i dunno hey.. its like the whole nite was a really fun nite for me.. somehow.. everyone seemed to be making me laugh.. yeahhh.. we had a catching up session from like 1030 till around 140am.. we were meant to talk abt the stuff that we'd gone thru the past one year.. but somehow.. we both ended up having to bring up alot of the things that happened during us.. its weird that both of us still have the stuff from each other.. haha and my memory aint that bad! hehe i remember one of the quotes i wrote on this laminated piece of paper thingy.. i wrote it again below... but it was strange to talk abt the past.. but wasnt really that bad.. after all it is my past.. and his as well.. so it aint that horrible.. and ahhhh one of the funny guys got this camera and took my picture..=( so embarrassing.. but its ok hey.. not a big deal.. it just felt really strange to have pple get the wrong idea abt u and someone.. cos it hasnt happened to me in a long long time...  woahh 2 catch ups was alottttt.. and yeah.. that went pretty well.. cos now at least i know.. the friendship isnt totally scrapped.. after which i went home late.. cos reiner drove me home.. haha and he so doesnt have a license.. fortunately i didnt die.. haha... yupp i went back home.. and the minute the door opened.. and i saw my dad.. BOOOOOOMMM! and the rest i mentioned at the top.. sigh..

i really miss all my friends in perth.. i cant wait to go back to see them.. and hang out again like we used to.. its like at least there i feel that there are pple who actually care.. i dun feel like my family cares so.. i wanna go back to perth!!!!

im going back on sunday finally.. this life is soo exhausting.. i feel its overrated...

a quote from me: Sometimes its better to lose ur pride to the one u love.. rather than to lose the one u love due to pride.©